things i learned today.
- although i understand her position on the matter, i will always stand by mine.
- i got ur back like chiroprac’. thru HELLZ and back.
- i can argue with somebody and still maintain a mutual respect. didn’t even know i had it in me.
- in the end, we’re all just ordinary people. (sing it, Mr. Legend)
- i thrive under pressure.
- I can’t do it all. but WE can.
- being direct and honest gets me from point a to point b seamlessly.
- i burn almost half my daily caloric intake with bikram yoga. 920 calories POOF’ed outta me. FUCK YES.
today has been… well.. very interesting to say the least. i dont need to get into details but i will say this: choose your tribe wisely. they can kill you spirit and your dreams with their kindness and good intentions. i’m blessed enough to have the most awesome tribe EH-VER. =)
remember: don’t let the hand you hold, hold you down. – Aubrey O’Day
be remarkable.
luckily for me, i am surround by remarkable people. i get inspired by them on a daily basis and i cannot thank them enough for pushing me to make waves… because that’s exactly what i’m doing.
thanks to one of my favorite girls, BetseyJ, for sharing this with me today. my favorites? know bullshit. make waves. LETS GO.
[click pic to read. it's worth ur while.]
Generation Prude Meets Generation Rude.
I was talking with my mom about the subject of gay marriage and my 100 year old grandma side-busted on our conversation and started talking shit. Full-out-wash-your-mouth-bonafide-shit talking. I was taken aback cuz my sweet lil’ ol’ grandma was spewing profanity usually reserved for my or my brother’s stupidity.
Not that she hates gays, nor anyone for that matter. But she was pissed off because “the world is so different from when she grew up. What’s right? What’s wrong? Where’s Up? Where’s down?” Betcha by golly wow, my lola has a valid point.
You see, my lola was born in 1909 and she didn’t know any gays. She also didn’t walk around in miniskirts and tops with low necklines. She didn’t stay out of the house past 8 pm, and she DEFINITELY didn’t have sex before she got married. None of her friends got pregnant at 15, nor snuck out of the house to sleep at their boyfriend’s. “Fucking cunt shit” was not part of her everyday vocabulary, and the word “bitch” was not a term of endearment.
I, on the other hand, am guilty of all of the above.
*Bless me Father, for I have sinned.*
My grandma used to always get mad at me for little shit. She’d always tell me my stomach would hurt when I wore midriffs (it was 1998, ok?) and scold me for being at my boyfriends house. Looking back, she also wasn’t afraid to tell him he was ugly… to his face. (ok, so he kinda was, but i was in love!)
My parents are less old fashioned — my mom had a tranny bridesmaid at her wedding — but thankfully are a comfortable medium between my lola and my MTV generation. So what happened in between her generation and mine that has created such a fucked up general moral compass?
Shit wasn’t perfect then either tho… Blacks, Women, and Gays weren’t treated equally nor civilly (and still don’t, but that’s another post in itself). and I get it.. shit goes out of style. But does self respect go out the window too? Since when has it been “normal” to have a 5th grader talk about blow jobs?
I don’t know wether it has to do with the media, the fact that I live in the most indulgent country on the planet or a culmination of both; however, the mere fact that kids are having kids, killing kids and stealing their mother’s boyfriends speaks volumes to me. Maury makes a living entertaining America with these stories while we tend to disassociate because the people on TV are somehow less real than the people next door. It’s crazy to realize that they are one in the same and frankly, its a sad state of affairs.
If our kids are acting like this, I don’t even want to know how their grand kids will turn out. These kids should meet my lola. She’d give em a good curse word or two.
TAHOE.
This last weekend my friends and I drove the four hours to Lake Tahoe to celebrate my Mike’s 27th birthday. i had a fucking BLAST. “how bout that drive up?”
The snow was majestic, Heavenly had no lines and the best hot chocolate, and we stayed in the best. cabin. EVER.
Our friends never cease to amaze me. They always prove that friends = family. DubLove.
the chase.
endless mimosas on a sunday with my gals equal lots of catching up, lightweight shit talking, and raunchy conversations. after hearing story after story on whats going on in their lives, their friends lives, their enemies lives (cuz facebook makes everyone a stalker), and beyond — i got to thinking.
i knew the chase was important, but i failed to realize that for some people, the chase is all consuming. and for some girls, its not about chasing dick, its about chasing love. but sometimes they dont see the difference between the two (its a twisted state of conciousness, i know).
i heard the story of a gal who chased her dude to different cities across the country in hopes of staying with him. mind you, he never invited her out, never made it clear that he wanted it to work with her. she has convinced herself inside and out that he is the one. she feels as if she’s found the love of her life, when he’s just along for the ride. and she’s probably fuckin’ him even though he has a girlfriend or loaning him money cuz “he only trusts you”… please. it’s not that he’s lying to her, but more that she’s lying to herself.
or how about the guy who’s crushed on the same girl for twenty seven months. sent her roses on her birthday, whisper sweet nothings into her ear, buy her drinks at the bar, hugs her too tight and flirts with her every chance he gets. then he fucks her and he’s in love. AHA! success! and because women can’t separate sex from their feelings, she falls in love too…. except she really falls in love and he really falls in lust. although it took twenty seven months to get into her pants, it takes him twenty seven minutes to tell her that it ain’t workin. why? cuz she’s been conquered and there’s another bitch to chase.
don’t hate the playa, hate the game. actually, hate the chase.
i know i’m making gross generalizations about men and women, and not all women are stupid and not all men are assholes (Reptar, i’m talkin’ to you) but for the sake of argument, humor me for just a second. there has to be at least ONE person in your life that fits the shoe, right? thats what i thought.
they call it “falling in love” cuz that’s exactly what you do… FALL. you don’t chase, you don’t lead, you don’t follow, you don’t jump, you fucking FALL. the only things that are meant to be chased are money and the ice cream truck. love ain’t a trophy and neither is your heart.
like they say, “you will always lose money chasin’ bitches, but you will never lose bitches chasin’ money” i’m just sayin.
cuz its been awhile
since i posted a vid of Adonis’…
and cuz this video from my birthday makes me laugh out loud EVERYTIME.
The Ex-Files
sorry for the lag on posting January’s short story. This ones taken straight from my personal vault…. Don’t forget to read parts 2, 3, and 4 on What The Hellz!
———————–
The Tale of a Girlfriend #2.
I smiled ear to ear as my boyfriend tells my mom he loves me. ”I love your daughter. I just wanted you to know.” My mom gave me that look.. (you know, that look) while simultaneously fake smiling at my new boyfriend of 6 weeks.
What a whirlwind six weeks it was though. Six weeks ago we locked eyes at Starbucks and I found myself infatuated with this man. Five weeks ago, we shared our first kiss at Ocean Beach. Four weeks ago he called me his girlfriend. Three weeks ago I met his parents. Two weeks ago he took me on our first trip to So-Cal. Last week he told me he loved me. Today, he tells my mom.
I watch him leave voicemails for three girls, telling them all that he’s with somebody now, and that they need to stop whatever they’re doing. Funny, I didnt even know he was seeing other people until the day before. He was driving me to the mall in my car, and I leaned over to kiss him. I can’t kiss him enough, I kind of almost make myself sick. Suddenly, he stiffens up and looks away, and I wonder what the fuck is going on. He points to the car in front of us, one of his side girls being the driver. I can see her looking at me in her rear view mirror….. she looks like a 12 year old boy.
I ask why it matters, and he tells me their story. I’m not really paying attention because I’m too annoyed that they even have a story. Who the fuck is she and why is my man trippin if she sees us?
“We used to have this thing…. we told each other we’d always be friends…. she’s dating this other guy now but he doesnt know about us…blah blah womp womp.”
Oh what was that? I couldn’t hear over the sound of me blacklisting the bitch.
I thought about this while I watched him dial her number and mentally added a checkmark to my “Win” column. I win. I heard him tell the other two breezies the same deal, and added two more checkmarks to my side. I’m petty and I’m a bitch but I really don’t care.
I win. I win over her, and her, and her. He loves me, and I win.
and i quote.
Men spend half their life doing things they shouldn’t do, and the other half of their life apologizing for them. Women spend their whole life forgiving. This is what I absolutely believe. — Jozen, Until I Get Married (aka the most amazing man blog i’ve ever read, aka hayati’s future husband)
givin’ up.
death by bikram last night was quite eventful. as i was walking in the studio, i noticed this behemoth of a woman, in my little sister’s shorts, a bush under her arms and more rolls than the local bakery. just as i was about to pull my phone out and snap a pic, the bitch did a standing split.
A STANDING SPLIT
i can barely touch my fucking toes and this hippo is as flexible as a gymnast. needless to say, i put my phone away and took my moded ass to the back to change.
for lent, i have vowed to give up TALKING SHIT (along with rice and MAKEUP!). lets see if i can keep this blog from becoming very very boring. lol.
what did u give up?
have you ever..
ever ask someone “how are you?” expecting nothing other than a quick “fine, and you?” but instead get a lifetime sob story to which ur STUCK listening to for the next 10 minutes as u try not to die inside?
yeah, me neither.
LMAO.
Raaachem
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