just an idea.

Reading Hayati’s blog this morning and came accross this:  “I like the person that you are, but I’m in love with the person that you have potential to be.”

I gotta give it up to all those ambitious people.  All the guys who say they’re gonna be somebody and actually become them.   To all the girls who want aspire to be better and more.   But this post isn’t gonna be about you.

It’s not gonna be about you because I’m a bitch, or Devil’s advocate or shit, maybe even Satan himself.  This post is about the rest of you.   The people who want to be somebody and do something, but don’t want to even START to get there.  The people who waste their potential on (insert petty shit here.) 

Ok, so maybe it’s not fair that I’m blaming my jaded sense of reality on you.  Maybe the blame should be put on the people who love you.  The people who love you regardless of how lazy you are, or how much you procrastinate or how dependant you are.   The people who enable you.  The people who see past all of that and LOVE THE PERSON YOU HAD SO MUCH POTENTIAL TO BE.  Because when they see you, they still see that person.  When the reality of it all, is that even after ten years together, you’re exactly the same person you were when you both met.   You haven’t grown.  You haven’t changed.  But they love you anyway, and it cuts both ways. 

There are no guarantees in life.  People change or they don’t and love is or isn’t enough.  What do you do when you fall in love with “potential?”   What happens when the person they COULD HAVE become never fucking shows up?   Where does the blame lie?   Is it your fault for being that way, or is it my fault for letting you think that being that way is acceptable?

I think the most important thing about potential, is that you both have to see it.  You both have to believe that you can be more and be better.   You can’t expect them to be better if they don’t think they can be.  

Don’t build your house on sand.  Don’t fall in love with potential when potential cannot love you back.


  1. Yesi Jukebox · July 30, 2010

    “Don’t fall in love with potential when potential cannot love you back.”
    Been there, done that..

  2. Cammille · July 30, 2010

    giiiirl, I know exactly. This reminds me of that quote in Eat Pray Love…

    “I have a history of making decisions very quickly about men. I have always fallen in love fast and without measuring risks. I have a tendency not only to see the best in everyone, but to assume that everyone is emotionally capable of reaching his highest potential. I have fallen in love more times than I care to count with the highest potential of a man, rather than with the man himself, and I have hung on to the relationship for a long time (sometimes far too long) waiting for the man to ascend to his own greatness. Many times in romance I have been a victim of my own optimism.”

    ain’t that a bitch.
    I always enjoy your writing. Hope all is well. 🙂

  3. Raaachem · July 30, 2010

    i think we’ve all been there and done that. we’ve all been that girl who’s held on for too long. who falls in love with the idea of a man, and not the man as he is. we’re women, its what we do. lol. @Camille, Eat Pray Love is an amazing read, isn’t it?

  4. Rio · July 30, 2010

    preach Rachel, Preach! Lol.

  5. tina · August 20, 2010

    fuck damn. this hits home.

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