Stop Yourself. (Again)

For all the boys who do too much.

Dear John,

Yeah, you.  You.   You who keeps asking me where we can honeymoon when we’ve only been on 3 dates.  Can you like, stop?   No really.  STOP YOURSELF.

Stop yourself from calling me 7 times a day to say good night, good afternoon and good morning.   A text will suffice.   You  could even slip in in there with the other 72 texts that you send me throughout the day.    While we’re on the subject, could you tone down the texts from 72 to about… 4?

Because I like you.  I enjoy your company, I think you’re funny, sexy, and I’d like to believe you’re my good karma.  But in all honesty, you’re kind of FREAKING ME THE FUCK OUT.


Stop trying so hard for something that should be easy.  Matter fact, just do that.  Be easy.   Cuz you’re so cute when you’re staring at me from accross the table.  And I like seeing your number on my caller ID.   But when I ask you how I look, I don’t wanna hear that I look like your future baby mama.

If you think you know what you’re doin, I’m here to tell you that it’s too much.  So please.  Stop yourself, before you ruin it.  Because I’d like you to walk beside me on whatever road we end up taking.

But we can’t do that if you get ahead of yourself.

I’m just sayin.

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