I sat alone for lunch the other day with no one’s company but my own.
Actually, I lie. I was with my iPhone.
I understand my iPhone isn’t an actual person. I know it doesn’t talk back to me, or laugh at my jokes, or even hold my purse when I’m in the bathroom. But it keeps me occupied in a crowded room when I don’t want to feel alone… or bored.
So I hop on Facebook and see what my friends are up to. I check my Twitter timeline to @reply someone because I know I’m not the only one out there by herself on lunch, and maybe our Twitter convo could make one less lonely girl. I YouTube so I can laugh at this fake person on the internet because the sound of my own laughter, albeit solo, is better than the sound of no laughter at all.
I realize my iPhone can’t give me an opinion on what to order. And it definitely won’t pick up the check. But it’s The Great Pretender when I want to look like I’m important — just furiously start typing into the screen like I’m answering an important email or texting back about 10 friends. I can make plans to not be alone for lunch tomorrow or even for dinner tonight so this “hanging out with my iPhone” doesn’t happen again.
Yeah, I look busy but I promise, I’m sooooooo not. Matter fact, I think I’m going to start taking solo lunches without it. I think I’d rather be alone in my own company because contrary to popular belief, there is no app for that.
It’s not that I don’t love my iPhone. It’s just that, I understand that it doesn’t love me back. And I don’t need to be hanging out with anyone or anything that doesn’t love me… I need all the love I can get.
((Just as I published this, I caught my soulmate’s last blog entry. Please read it. Because “lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless, and lonely is healing if you make it.”))
Bawlz tho,but I can totally relate. Whenever I’m on my lunch break at school and can’t find good company to hang out with, I can’t be on my phone–not because I can’t, but because I don’t want to. I guess it’s something I’ll have to deal with until I move out of San Diego.