“Trying to convince myself I found one, making the mistake I never learn from.
I swear I always fall for your type.
I just can’t explain this shit at all.”
I know a lot of people may say they don’t have a specific “type.” You’re attracted to who you’re attracted to, but on the same token, I’m almost positive these men have a lot of the same qualities. For instance, I once dated a man who let me walk all over him. Needless to say, we didn’t date for very long and every man I’ve dated since has definitely not been the type to let me do the same. My girl seems to always date the ‘industry’ kids, the ones who throw parties, know a lot of people (and all the groupies). My other girl? She got a thing for the broken ones. The ones who have had his heart-broken because she wants to be the one to mend him back to life. I knew another girl who had her heart broken by a man, only to jump into the arms of another man who LOOKED EXACTLY LIKE HIM.
Point is, we may not always go for a tall dark and handsome type, but we may always go for an artsy guy or a musician, or a domineering jealous type. We know what we like, and we always seem to look for the same things in a partner.
I read something the other day that made me pause though. I don’t remember it exactly but it was somethin’ along the lines of: “The definition of failure is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting the same results. To get something you’ve never had, you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.”
And for those of us who keep wondering WTF is wrong with US that we always seem to be heartbroken over a man, it might just be because we keep making the same kind of mistakes with the same kind of men. Like I said tho, we know what we like. I’m not saying to abandon that completely because shit, I’m sure it’s taken a lot of bad boyfriends to figure out what you want and need in someone you decide to invest in. I’m just sayin, it won’t be so bad to think outside the box.
Have y’all ever watched What Chilli Wants? That woman keeps looking for a man that doesn’t exist, and because of it has found herself lonely. She’s beautiful and successful, pushing 40 and single. Not to talk shit, but her “type” hasn’t been workin’ out for her. Her dating coach tells her to just try shit. TRY SHIT! How easy is is to try something? Not very, considering some people are terrified of doing anything outside of their comfort zone.
Do something you’ve never done. Try sushi for the first time. Go skydiving. Apply for the job you never thought you could get. Test drive the car that’s too expensive. Shop at the flea market. Date a man you never thought you ever would.
Because the guy who’s not your type could just be everything you never knew you always wanted. And I know you’re the type of girl who just wants to be happy.
I believe in people like you, and I believe in your type.