Post #602

When did this pen go from being just a pen to my arch nemesis?  It used to be my outlet, and now it’s just this thing that’s standing between my head and this paper.

I used to find solace in this keyboard.  My happiness lingered here, with every click of the mouse and stroke of the key.  It was a breath of fresh air, everytime I’d hit the publish button.

And here I am, having a love/hate relationship with this thing.  Uninspired.  Lost.  My brain picks at bits and pieces from my memory as of late, but it’s never enough inspiration to warrant a full post, never enough to even start an in-depth conversation about, just never…really…enough.

So instead of this blog playing it’s role as my outlet it’s become this sort of monster, haunting me in my daydreams.   This thing that is not hungry for what I’ve been feeding it.  This gang — the pen, the paper, and the computer — who have all turned against me.   

I used to look at a blank screen and eagerly and effortlessly fill it up with words and ideas.  Now I just look at a blank screen and draw a blank. 

It’s probably a reflection on the other things that are going on in my life right now, as my plate is overflowing with this and that and him and her and them and us. 

I need to FOCUS.

 

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