It’s an all too familiar story.
I find myself in the bathroom of a retail space, crying on the freshly painted floor. It’s a good thing I didn’t wear any makeup today, as it all would have gone to shit otherwise. My entire face is wet, the tears dripping down from my eyes, to the hands that cradle my face, to the knees that are holding up my arms, to the floor which doesn’t feel very sturdy at all. My entire body is hot, and my head hurts from all the hyperventilation. I haven’t cried like this in years.
After 20 minutes of being the only attendant at my own pity party, I re-emerge into the world, puffy eyes and all. And then something crazy happens… My friend hands me a shot of Jameson. And my other friend plays my favorite song over the loud speaker. And one of my really good friends made plans to take me to dinner… and then….I..FORGOT.
For a second. Which turned into a minute, which then became an hour, and then became half a day.
I forgot about the fight, and the tears, and the puffy eyes and the thoughts and occurrences that got us to this place: on the floor of the bathroom. I walked back into that same bathroom to drop off the alcohol I had just consumed into the toilet, looked at the floor and remembered. Remembered it all.
I looked back into the mirror at myself and realized that my tears, they had dried all on their own. And I was ok.
Love is just love. What love isn’t, is enough.