This is not  love letter. This is a letter about love.  Actually, it’s an email between a friend and I about our idea of love. It’s lengthy, but take a minute to read about it. It’s interesting to see what people have to say about love, because it means different things to different people. To share these ideas, creates an understanding of the ideal, that some of us may not have even thought about.  Enjoy the words.  Read them, take them in, and then tell me what your thoughts on love are.

HIM (a school teacher with a free spirit and a kind soul):
Did I ever share with you my thoughts on love?  I wrote a lot about love this summer. 

We have been created and evolved in a way in which love, the commitment to another person in which you nurture his or her well-being, is the foundation for what makes us human, and what makes humans the most successful species on this planet.  Lots of studies show that facial expressions, emotions, even habits are all contagious between people.  This means, that our connections determine our reality.  Like the religious idea of a god that determines our reality.  We create our reality.  I MEAN WE.  Not you by yourself or me by myself, but US together.  Speaking of religion, they do not agree on god or salvation, but they all have agreed on the importance of loving all humans.  I do not believe there is a god or at most an omnipotent an omnigood god.  How do I know?  Over 20,000 children die everyday from disease and lack of water.  My spirit has been felt so full this year when I started telling my students I love them and showing them.  

The problem of course is people do not really honor love. Parents tell their kids when they hit them, “This is for your own good because I love you.”  That is abuse.  Abuse cannot exist with love, it negates love.  Why?  Because love is the commitment to another person in which you nurture his or her well-being.  Friends lead their friends to do unhealthy or dangerous things but say that they love each other.  Domestic violence.  Priests and molestation.  And OF COURSE, the worst part is, my kids and lots of other humans grow up, thinking the wrong thing about love.  Bringing each other down or keeping each other stuck, rather than lifting us up, due to the false impression of love. 

I know what I am saying is cliche, but now I feel it.  I am full with love and I am trying to share it with those around me.  I have always tried to help those around me, because I thought it as the right thing to do.  But now I know that my spirit, and the spirit of all humans who have come before me and after, was built for love and it is my duty to care about the well-being of others. 

ME (a writer and a mother with a new found openness): 
Thank you so much for sharing this. This is beautiful.  If you’d allow me, my thoughts on what you just shared….

HER (a romantic convinced she’s a cynic and one of the most amazing women I know): 
Thank you so much for letting me read this.  It has definitely opened my eyes to see love in a whole different light…through what he said and what you have said.  I know what I must sound like when I talk about not believing in love and whatnot.  I hear myself and every time I say “I don’t believe ‘relationship’ love exists for me,” it’s as if I’m having an out of body experience.  It doesn’t feel like me.  Then again, I’m still in the process of self discovery.  Don’t get me wrong, I know that love exists.  And I agree with what you and he have said.  But I’m still trying to figure out what love is and what love means to me.  Obviously, I feel love…with family and friends.  But that relationship type love?  Negative.  I can’t say I have even been IN love only because outside factors distorted that for me.  Was I in love or was it a feeling of self love/validation through someone wanting to be with me?  I can’t completely say.  Do I think that I can feel it one day?  Sure.  But to keep my hopes high would be setting myself up for disappointment.  It would be nice to believe that one day I might fall in love.  However, until it happens, it’s something that will remain just an idea.  An idea with potential.